Why do I devote endless hours of my life trying to churn out the perfect word or phrase to describe how I'm feeling?

         

           Am I the only author who doesn’t spend much of their time thinking, but instead spends most of their time lazily attending to life?

           

                 Why would I choose hours of solitude and thought over being with people when I seriously hate being alone for too long?

         

           Why would I even consider devoting my life or career to writing novels when today’s book sales are dropping like the ball on New Year’s Eve? 

         

                 Why do I spend my time creating characters and stories that may have been created before?

         

           What’s the point of writing when you know the only printed copy of your book will probably be crammed in the back corner of Barnes and Noble with only the two inches of its binding to recommend it to the world?

         

                  What makes me want a life where I'll no doubt be penniless, or what makes me think I’m the next J. K. Rowling?

           

 

All good questions, let’s see if I have some answers

 

            

            I think the first time I had that true spark inside me was when I was sitting in the attic with two of my sisters. We liked to do all kinds of things in that attic of ours, on a rainy day we would: play with our doll house, do puzzles, even create mazes for our hamster to go through. This evening we were writing. I don’t know how often I would write before this, because I’m not sure how old I was, but I know it was relatively soon after I learned to read and write.

               

 

           Well, we weren’t planning on staying up there our entire lives, the three of us, so we set a fifteen minute timer. I still remember being amazed by my oldest sister Rachel’s writing. I thought, ‘How can anyone be this good with words and in such a short amount of time?’ And she thought, it wasn’t very good because she hadn’t written enough; but hey, quality over quantity any day (unless you’re writing a rough draft for that essay that was assigned weeks ago.) Anyway, as any honest kid would do, I complained. I congratulated then complained.

            “How come you’re that good? I’ll never be that good.” Wow! You know someone’s words are influential when they change the course of your life. The next sentence had it coming. “Chloe,” she said, (don’t quote me on this), “You just have to keep writing. You might think my writing’s really good, but mine is still far from perfect. You’re already good for your age and if you keep writing you’ll only get better. You just have to keep writing.”

 

           

          Um, that was 9 or ten years ago, um, my sister’s ten years older than me, um, if I was 6 or 7 she was 16 or 17, um, I’m 16. How often do I tell kids that they just need to keep writing, that they’re good for their age? I forget because I’m too worried with my present day writing. I forget it could change the course of their life. To be honest, I forgot about the actual things Rachel told me until I just now tried to remember so I could tell you. But you know why I’ll never forget what she told me? Because she kept telling me. Never the same words, but always the same selfless attention, and meaning. Whenever I was having a writing crisis, the same message rang true. My writing is still far from perfect; it will never be. I’ll never reach some final level of writing and have a meltdown like I would for candy crush, (thank goodness, because I’ve had plenty of meltdowns along the way.)  

 

 

          So for all you “wannabe” writers out there or “wannabe” whatever’s, I would like to tell you, “You are good for your age, and if you keep writing you’ll get even better.” That quote - sappy. The fact - if you are simply writing, you are good for your age, because you are simply doing it. Oh, and the words “for your age” are significant because I like to see their double meaning. For your age could also mean, for your generation, which is true since people nowadays are even less willing to persist when the going gets tough or the writing gets cheesy. In a world of auto-tune, it’s not hard to see how true talent gets drowned out and expectations lowered. This inhibits the Mozart’s of today from receiving much glory, and they do exist. If all Mozart had done with his prodigy talent, was watch Netflix and receive praise for his second rate playing, imagine what the world would be missing. Now imagine what the entire world must be missing today. My point? What’s the point of perseverance when others aren’t competitors or when necessity isn’t calling? Have you ever heard of healthy competition?

           

 

          If I could sum up writing in one word it would be persistence.

If I hadn’t persevered through some painful auditions, I wouldn’t have received a larger role in a Shakespeare play and had a blast performing. Yes, I’m an amateur actor, but getting better is so much fun.

           

          I encourage you to get better. Just because a certain type of writing comes more easily for me NOW doesn’t mean there aren’t a billion pieces of writing that are critical to the making of the overall quilt. My friend is so great at character development and has the best relationships between her characters, but she says she struggles with plot formation and idealizing. Whereas I can come up with crazy plot twists, and human struggles, but my characters might be as shallow as a baby pool.

           

 

          So why do I do it? Because I enjoy it. If I didn’t enjoy writing, I wouldn’t write. It’s as simple as that. This isn’t the same as saying if I don’t enjoy writing on a particular day, I won’t. Not only would that logic not have brought me here today, I wouldn’t have had half the fun. Sometimes the days I determine I’m going to hate writing, I enjoy it the most. And the better you get at something the more fun you have.

 

         

           I used to want to be the youngest author to publish a novel that was awarded New York Times bestseller (and if that’s your dream keep working at it,) but now I just want to keep writing!